My first impressions of Anne Lamott

Recently I have finished my first Anne Lamott book, "Plan B". For the most part it was what I expected, though I did learn more than I wanted to about women in their 50's. I can understand why she has been compared with Donald Miller. Both chat about life and are not afraid of the little quarks that make life fun. As my friend always says about Donald Miller, it was like reading a personal journal. She talked about growing old and getting fat. She talked about how she hated that Bush had gotten reelected. (Yes the book was a few years old.) She vented about the frustrations of having a teenage son. She also was honest about her fears of death. The book dealt with death a lot. From the death of her mom, to the death of their dog, to the death of a close friend. Sometimes, it got a little personal, even for me. But other times I just didn't get it. Maybe because I am not a 50 year old woman, I don't know. But I do know that one of the last chapters was the best advice I have ever heard from given to people in my generation.

She had a chapter devoted to coming of age. It was a sample of what she says when she is asked to speak at a college graduation service. Right from the beginning I was captivated and by the end I was in tears. I will be honest, even after reading her book and getting to know she wasn't like any of the 50 year old women I know (for one, she has dreadlocks), when I heard that she was speaking to college graduated I was expecting the typical advice given to young adults; get a J O B, make money, pay bills, be responsible. I was greatly shocked and comforted. I was reading something very different that the typical advice. She wasn't saying not get a job, though there were lines that would frustrate parental types to no end. She was saying that getting a job wasn't the end all. It wasn't going to solve your problems. It wasn't going to make you happy. It wasn't going to pay your bills, they will still be there and most likely will be more than you can or want to pay. She was telling us, pleading with us, not to buy into the lie the world keeps shoving at us, that being money is the answer. It's not.

I didn't know what to think. I honestly was speechless. I expected this idealistic thinking from someone in their 20's or 30's, but not from someone in their 50's. And not from a mom. But there it was in black ink before me. I reread the words and felt for the first time I was successful. I keep telling myself that I haven't bought into the lie, but I have. I feel the "shame" of not having a "successful" job. I feel the need to impress people with titles and degrees and fancy this or that, even if I rebel against it half the time. But reading this, this was something different. She wasn't advocating the rebellious spirit that I get from 20 somethings. No, she was not rebellious at all, but was merely exposing the lie for what it was, a lie.

She ended she speech with a call to rest. Relax. She realized that many of the graduates were immediately starting careers, or were going to be forced into starting careers because of their parents. But in spite of that she challenged us not to feel the pressure of life. She instead challenged us to rest and take a break. A break? Was she serious? Yes, she was. She wanted us to take time out to find ourselves, and who we were going to be, instead of listen to the world all the time. I needed to hear that. I also needed to hear her say that if our parents pressured us to be the most successful in our field, the one with the most accolades, making the most money, then we should show them to the admissions office and they can go and fulfill those dreams. What we needed, after a most stressful career of working through college and listen to God knows how many voices bombarding us with advice about what we should do with our lives, was quiet our life, rest, and listen to the only voice that matters. Your own.