Sometimes

Sometimes
...I dream about doing life instead of living it
...I hate people including you
...I wish I had more friends
...I wish I didn't have any friends
...I long for marriage
...I fear the future
...I am alone and love it
...I am sick of my own thoughts
...I cry
but only sometimes

Sometimes
...I am excited
...I feel the passion burning inside me
...I can't control myself
...I drive for hours and tour my own city
...I want to hold you and cry with you
...I want to disappear
...I wonder
...I pretend
...I wish you weren't there
but only sometimes

Sometimes
...I don't give a shit
...I really don't give a shit
...I smile and pretend while not giving a shit
...I use you
...I enjoy using you
...I hate you
...I forget things I have said and say them again
...I question life
...I accept life
but only sometimes

Sometimes
...I am me
...I don't know who I am
...I love God
...I hate God
...I want to wake up and be 5
...I want to wake up and be 85
but only sometimes